Jokes about lists.

Feb 3, 2022 · A German walks into a bar and asks for a martini. The bartender asks, “Dry?”. The German replies, “Nein, just one.”. Explanation: “Drei”—pronounced “dry”—is German for “three ... The joke-teller begins "knock, knock," the person hearing the joke replies "who's there," and then the joke-teller proceeds to set up a pun or humorous turnaround. However, in an anti-joke version, the "knock knock" scenario is commonly played straight, subverting the attempt at humor. - Knock Knock. - Who's there?Dec 7, 2020 · Michael Schulman on ten great performances. is a newsletter editor at The New Yorker. Ian Crouch rounds up the funniest moments, intentional and otherwise, of 2020, including Trump impressions ... Feb 13, 2024 ... This list of ideas includes: humorous icebreakers; funny introduction jokes; good opening jokes; best ice breaker lines; jokes to break the ice ...Jan 7, 2022 · All bottled up. “We used to play spin the bottle when I was a kid. A girl would spin the bottle, and if the bottle pointed to you when it stopped, the girl could either kiss you or give you a ...

A list of funny winter jokes! Winter truly is the most wonderful time of the year. A time when it’s perfectly acceptable to bundle up in a pea coat with a fifty-foot Doctor Who scarf and a mug of hot cider to get warm and push your way through the snow covered crowds to buy a gift for your sweetie. Anyway, these are the funniest winter jokes to …

The hip replacement joke, “Hip replacement? He was never hip to begin with!” is written to go along with a hip replacement cartoon by Marty Bucella that jokes about the character’s...

Quality assurance engineer walks into a bar... He orders 1 beer. Then he orders 2 beers. Then he orders 9999999 beers. Then he orders -1 beer. Then he orders a dragon. Then he asks to buy a jdhdjsbeh. Another customer walks in, asks where the bathroom is. The bar collapses and kills everyone inside.A QA Engineer walks into a bar. Orders a beer. Orders 0 beers. Orders 999999999 beers. Orders a lizard. Orders -1 beers. Orders a sfdeljknesv.Oct 25, 2023 · 150 School Jokes. School can be a roller coaster of emotions, packed with joyous moments, challenging hurdles, and, of course, a significant amount of learning. But amidst all the study hours and the endless flow of homework, there’s always room for a good, hearty laugh. This collection of school jokes is designed to lighten your mood and add ... A man buys the newspaper every morning, glances at the first page, then throws it away. One day the newspaper man asks him why. - I'm just interested in the obituaries, says the guy. - But these are on page 5! - Yeah, the one I'm expecting will be on the first page. Jesus Christ fed 5000 with five loaves and two fish.U.S. Army Jokes. Discover a funny military joke about the U.S. Army with this list. Everything from puns to some sarcastic one-liners are included in the Army jokes below to crack on an Army member you know and love. Spread Your Wings. Two PFCs are walking down the street and one of them says, “Oh look, a dead bird.”

150 School Jokes. School can be a roller coaster of emotions, packed with joyous moments, challenging hurdles, and, of course, a significant amount of learning. But amidst all the study hours and the endless flow of homework, there’s always room for a good, hearty laugh. This collection of school jokes is designed to lighten your mood and add ...

89 Email Jokes. In the fast-paced digital world we live in, where communication is often reduced to the click of a button, it’s easy to forget that even the most mundane aspects of our online lives can be a source of humor. Email, an integral part of our daily routine, has also found its way into the realm of jokes and puns.

After reading through all these monkey jokes we hope you had a good laugh. If you want to hear more funny animal jokes, then check out these other great lists of funny jokes: Bee jokes; Jokes about dolphins; Dinosaur jokes for kids; Funny dog punsMay 1, 2024 · One-Liner Dad Jokes. RIP boiling water, you will be mist. I once wrote a song about a tortilla, but it's more of a wrap. A witch's vehicle goes brrroom brrroom! The waiter asked if I wanted a box for my leftovers, but I told him I’m not into fighting. Here’s the joke that crossed the line for Tom Brady during his Netflix roast. Tom Brady arrives for “The Greatest Roast of All Time: Tom Brady” on Sunday at the Kia …Jan 6, 2023 · Déjà brew. What's a llama's favorite movie? "Alpaca-lypse Now." Why shouldn't you make a dinosaur mad? Because you'll get Jurass-kicked. What do math books wear under their covers? Alge-bras. You don't have to be a genius to tell (or enjoy) these clever jokes. In fact, we explain the punch lines so you can feel like a smarty-pants.Every good joke has two essential components: the setup and the punchline. The Setup. The setup of a cat joke sets the stage for the punchline. It provides the necessary context or scenario that creates anticipation in the listener. For example, a classic cat joke setup might involve a cat attempting a daring feat or being in a humorous situation.

The holiday season is a time for joy, laughter, and creating memories with loved ones. And what better way to spread some holiday cheer than with a good old-fashioned Santa Claus j...The holiday season is a time for joy, laughter, and creating memories with loved ones. And what better way to spread some holiday cheer than with a good old-fashioned Santa Claus j...Make a noise like a carrot. A driver and a zebra are out for a drive when they get pulled over by the police. The police officer looks in the car and says “You need to take that zebra to the zoo.”. So the driver turned around and took the zebra to the zoo right away.Honest Brand Slogans. Hallmark: “When you care enough to give a card mass-produced by a corporation.”. Ritz crackers: “Tiny, edible plates.”. CliffsNotes: “They’re still going to know ...Being a dad isn’t purely biological. Sure, one prerequisite of fatherhood is to actually have children, but there’s also a psychological aspect all true dads share: the love of the...

You two may joke or remark every now and then about your appearances, but lately it's more. Body dysmorphic disorder is serious. Here's how to help if they ask. You might feel caug...

By DeMicia Inman. May 15, 2024 4:13pm. Katt Williams at Katt Williams: Woke Foke for Netflix is a Joke Festival at the Youtube Theater on Saturday, May 4, …Dad jokes are more than funny jokes that happen to be told by men with kids. They walk a razor-thin line between wit and dumb humor, equal parts cheesy and hilarious.A great dad joke is almost always a variation on the pun — a punchline that’s both super ridiculous and cerebrally obscure.One is a necromancer and the other is a neck romancer. A man walks into a magic forest and tries to cut down a talking tree. “You can't cut me down,” the tree complains. “I’m a talking ...I am over 18. Meet your newest employee. My salary shall be 5000 bucks. (TKZS = a state-run commie collective farm.) A man walks in the TKZS' boss office and says: "Meet your newest employee. My salary shall be 5000 bucks." The boss laughs straight at his face: "Comrade, the average salary here is 150 bucks. I don't make 500. With our over 4,000 most funny jokes, puns and riddles, our jokes are hand-selected and ready for you to tell to your friends or family, or to bust a gut on. They say a joke becomes a dad joke when it becomes apparent. We would say it's when it's all groan. (Sorry.) The post 151 Best Dad Jokes That Are Actually Pretty Funny appeared first on Reader's ...A white Christmas! *** Great joke for adults: whales at sea ***. A male whale and a female whale see a fishing boat – the male whale recognized the ship that caught his dad whale a year ago. He asks the female whale “let’s both get under the boat, blow air out of our air holes, and it might topple the ship.”.

The Simpsons "Treehouse of Horror V" is widely considered to be the best of the Halloween specials, and one of the best episodes of the show ever. It starts off with a bevy of jokes and references immediately. …

After reading through all these hilarious jokes about friends, we hope you had a good laugh. If you want to hear more funny puns, then check out these other great lists of funny jokes: Colonoscopy jokes; Fart puns; Jokes about poop; Boomer jokes for kids

Hurting you is the last thing I want to do… but it's still on the list. RELATED: 152 Funny Short Jokes That Guarantee a Laugh. Good Roasts That Rhyme. Leka Sergeeva/Shutterstock. Everybody knows that you're stupid… thought you could fall in love because you saw a fake Cupid.Déjà brew. What's a llama's favorite movie? "Alpaca-lypse Now." Why shouldn't you make a dinosaur mad? Because you'll get Jurass-kicked. What do math books wear under their covers? Alge-bras.Here’s the joke that crossed the line for Tom Brady during his Netflix roast. Tom Brady arrives for “The Greatest Roast of All Time: Tom Brady” on Sunday at the Kia …Nov 1, 2023 · The Best Jokes About Friends. Friends are a blessing in your life. If your friends are true, you can always find them by your side, no matter how sad, happy, or challenging the situation is. And as you already know, jokes have the power to make you laugh. So, when friends and jokes are combined, there ought to be happiness and laughter all ... Déjà brew. What's a llama's favorite movie? "Alpaca-lypse Now." Why shouldn't you make a dinosaur mad? Because you'll get Jurass-kicked. What do math books wear under their covers? Alge-bras.93+ Funny Toasts, Witty Cheers. Use these funny toasts at weddings, parties, or any social gathering. They are all … Short Toasts, Easy to Remember Cheers. These short toasts are perfect for the memory-challenged or just as a go-to line you … Wedding. Short Wedding Toasts.Not Happy. 2. A priest, a minister, and a rabbit walk into a blood bank. The rabbit says, “I believe that I am a type o.”. 3. You know, there’s a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore like an idiot. 4. I’ll never forget my dad’s face when I gave him his 50th birthday card, tears in his eyes, as he said to me, ‘One ...7. When your drunk self decides to take a crack at it. ... but then gives up and delegates to sober you. 8. Or when your husband takes the list *too* literally. 9. When a 7-year-old makes a major ...It doesn’t matter if you need some snappy comebacks for your next boring math lecture or simply want something amusing after a long day at work – these jokes will surely hit the spot. So grab your calculator (or abacus if that’s more your style) and let’s dive into this hysterical list together! List of Jokes about Numbers . 1.1. What do kids play when their mom is using the phone? Bored games. 2. What do you call an ant who fights crime? A vigilANTe! 3. Why are snails slow? Because …A giant list of puns. What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta. I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy. Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable. Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long! I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying. What do you call a belt with a ...

A QA Engineer walks into a bar. Orders a beer. Orders 0 beers. Orders 999999999 beers. Orders a lizard. Orders -1 beers. Orders a sfdeljknesv.Aug 28, 2023 · 15. ADVERTISEMENT. A one-liner, also known as a punchline in some cases, is a truly remarkable form of a joke. First of all, it is so short that by telling it, you’ll never miss the ‘magical moment’ and will always leave your audience amused (that is if you’ve calculated your timing perfectly). Hence, if you are looking for a comedic ... The old folks home was very secure. Each door was guarded by a century. You may be old, but I don't carrot all. Be kind to your children, because when you get older, they're the ones who are going to choose your nursing home. Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth.Yo momma so stupid, she went to the eye doctor to get an iPhone. Yo momma so stupid, she climbed over a glass wall to see what was on the other side. Yo momma’s so stupid, she went to the dentist to get a Bluetooth. Yo momma’s so stupid, she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.Instagram:https://instagram. the phillips museum dctorrid clothing storelos angeles plane ticketsfree app creator 74 Funny Story Jokes That Earn Their Laughs. Linas Simonaitis and. Justė Kairytė - Barkauskienė. 27. 1. ADVERTISEMENT. A one-liner is well and fine if you need a quick joke to brighten up the mood. Yet, sometimes, the need arises for something longer, more along the lines of a funny story. But we all know how these situations tend to go—if ... xfinity.com activateflight tickets to san luis potosi After reading through all these hilarious jokes about friends, we hope you had a good laugh. If you want to hear more funny puns, then check out these other great lists of funny jokes: Colonoscopy jokes; Fart puns; Jokes about poop; Boomer jokes for kidsJan 13, 2022 ... The best jokes ever performed soon become iconic classics, and there is no better iconic joke than a one-liner. We've compiled a list of the ... brothersoft printer software Instead of getting crisp, clean water out of the sink, you get something that resembles mud. When these moments happen, it is important to look at the bright side of life. Hire a plumber to fix your piping while you get on your phone and laptop and read through these hilarious plumbing jokes. Whatever your problem is, you will see it is not …Goodbye boiling water, you will be mist. All the fruits go on vacation in Pear-is. The dry-erase board is the most remarkable invention. I brought an egg to a comedy show and he cracked up. It ...